Let It Go

It's been said that you don't forgive someone for their sake, you forgive them for your sake. About two years ago, I was hurt very deeply by a couple who I thought were some of my closest friends. I actually thought of them as family. All of us were not on the same page on some things that I was under the impression we were, and feelings were hurt. As a result, I have only spoken with one of them a couple of times for professional reasons, but only to ask for a professional reference. I may have spoken to either of them two to three times in the past two years for under 5 minutes per conversation. I grieved the loss of their friendship, and had accepted that any relationship we had was over. I forgave them, and moved on with my life.

Today, I got a random text from a number I didn't recognize asking if it was still my number. I was intrigued, and replied that it was. It was one of them. I instantly that, "What the **** do they want from me now? I've stayed out of their lives like they asked. What the hell could they possibly want from me?" The text said that they understood if I didn't want to talk, but they were in a very different place now and had talked a lot about what happened, and this person understands it much more. They told they felt bad about how it ended, and how they dealt with it. They also said they hoped I was happy and that they still think and care about me.

WTF!!!!!

I didn't know how to respond to that. I had put everything behind me. To be honest, I haven't really thought about them in longer than I can guess. I mean, I asked for a reference a few months ago from one of them, but I hung up and had no thoughts about them. I have gotten to a point where I am at peace with them just being people that I used to know. My mind went through many different thoughts: is this part of some 12 step program, what happened in their lives to bring this about, what do they want from me, is this part of some counseling, etc? How do I even respond to that? Do they really think I'm going to respond? Do they even want me to respond? 

After much counsel with the people who were closest to me when the event happened, I was still undecided about how to handle this situation. I finally decided that I needed to get advice from someone who I could give the 5 minute snippet to and get their opinion on it. I went to a friend who had no previous knowledge on the situation, and his advice was exactly what I felt needed to be done. Let them know I received the texts, I appreciate the sentiments, and wish them well. I took his advice, and also added in that I had put those events behind me a long time ago. 

They replied back that it was heavy on them to share that with me. I didn't reply back. I probably won't reply back. I don't feel there's a need to reply back. They asked me to stay out of their lives, and I plan to respect that. Now that I live 14 hours away, it's not as if we run in the same social circles for that to be awkward. It takes a lot for me to remove people who I've felt were family from my life, and once I've removed anyone from my life, it takes a lot to get me to let you back in. I hope that they got whatever peace from this exchange today that they were looking for. I'm happy with my life the way it is, and there's no reason to look back. 

I found this on Pinterset as I was originally going through this situation and 

helped me get to a place of acceptance with the situation.